Clean and Clear and Under His Control :)

It started with a couple of tiny bumps on my chin. Bacteria under the skin. Ugh. I poked and prodded at them causing them to bleed. What was previously so tiny and barely visible was now red and very easy to spot. My roommate jokingly told me that no one could see the breakout on my chin from a mile away and with the lights out- i laughed and chided back that from a mile away and in the dark it could still be seen- almost like a flashing red stop light, hard to miss.

It was horrible. My face is usually pretty clear and i was disgusted with this little area of irritation. What made it worse is that i was going out. I wanted to look my best and flawless so i covered it with makeup to the best of my ability. I think it worked pretty well (im sure it was not as visible to people but i knew what was there)...but...the only thing was that the next day it was still just as red and irritated if not more so. The next morning i was getting ready for work and once again i wanted to cover it up, embarrassed. But i stopped myself when i realized it would only take longer to heal if i kept it masked in makeup.

All of a sudden, a ridiculous breakout on my face became an allegorical moment. A depiction of my heart. How often do i have some hidden bacteria (or wrong motive) that gets poked, then bleeds and is seen but i just cover it up so as to hide it from others? (All the while i know what lies under the mask, though at times i may forget it is there)

There are many times when wrong motives or bad fruits (anything opposite of the fruits of the spirit- joy, peace, patience, gentleness...) show their little (sometimes over-sized) heads due to our circumstances. Our core fears get poked and prodded, and pops out our flaws. So we cover it up with staying busy or appearing to be good enough still or spiritual- anything to make us appear as if we have no underlying flaws.

Is it worth the charade? I dare say it is not. For in covering up our flaws, we slow the process of restoration. In the New Testament, Paul even taught the valuable lesson that it is good to confess one to another; to reveal your flaws for it brings healing. Yet we trick ourselves into thinking that covering it up works best, while the irritation still lies there under the mask, unresolved and unhealed.

This breakout just occurred this past weekend. I stopped trying to cover it up and went to work yesterday and today without anything on it. (Which is not too big of a deal for me since I usually am not one to wear foundation make-up anyway, only for special occasions or as i did to cover up my flaws) And today its not red and irritated. It is still there but is healing and fading. Being exposed, not being masked over, has brought healing.

Who would have ever thought that the undesirable flaws that appeared on my face could teach me such a valuable heart lesson? What are you masking over and preventing from being healed? We fail when we try to appear clean and clear, under our control- we must get real and allow God to clean and clear us and give Him control.